Free Nonsense
Let’s just figure out what nonsense is
By Edgar Jimenez*
As many others before me, I was invited to write a “free nonsense” for BIP. After some time writing only about the results of my research, it is quite challenging to write something on a “free topic”. For the last three years at INESC TEC, I have written only about airports and right now I am dropping these lines at my favourite: the Porto airport. But that won't be the topic today. That is what I always talk about with my colleagues at UESP [INESC TEC’s Manufacturing Systems Engineering Unit], so I don't want to bore them anymore.
The request came in Portuguese asking for an “asneira” (nonsense). Since I am not Portuguese I had to do a brief literature review (I hope the BIP editors are not very strict on these issues) to find out what an “asneira” is. With lots of slang still to learn, I usually hear the word “asneira” when Portuguese moms tell their kids not to say or do “asneiras”. So I went to the dictionary and I realised it means stupid things, nonsense ideas or swear words. Conscious of the high reputation of INESC TEC and its cutting-edge science and technology, I am sure it is the nonsense they want, not the other options.
So here is my absurd suggestion: let's index BIP on any renowned database. By doing so, we at INESC TEC could dramatically increase our scientific production. After all, some of the biggest enigmas in science have already been discussed in this Bulletin, such as the responsibility of the “extinction room” in the first floor for the evolution of life on Earth, especially the life-forms that don't publish regularly.
Other fantastic technological developments could also be part of this BIP Journal of Science and Technology, such as the encryption algorithms for the elevators in the new building; or the motion sensors that activate the lights in the new building only when you have already walked through the hall in the dark (as a metaphor for PhD students that reminds us there is light at the end of the tunnel, but you will see it only when you are there).
Other than nonsense, they also asked me to write about my experience at INESC TEC. It is so diverse and positive, in fact, that I would go over the word limit of this column (I can't stop thinking this is not a peer-reviewed journal and that this article won't go through the hands of an evil editor). I think it is enough to say that I am very proud of being part of the team, not only at UESP, because sometimes I feel I am part of UITT [INESC TEC’s Innovation and Technology Transfer Unit] as well, but obviously at INESC TEC.
In any case, I couldn't miss the opportunity of telling something I go through regularly, in and outside of INESC TEC, which is related to my origins: I am from Colombia (should I have started with this?). Often, there are some unfortunate commentaries to which I and my fellow Colombians grow accustomed while abroad. Luckily, I have always felt welcome in Porto it is amazing to see that this city has great appreciation for the Colombians (it’s a shame I am not that good at football... luckily my team mates in the football tournament thought I was from Paraguay and so their expectations were not that high).
Anyway, I encourage you to ask my advisers whether they like that Colombian product that is much appreciated worldwide. Yes, you are right, it is coffee I am talking about! My advisers are the only lucky ones to have received the packs I always bring in my bag when I come from Colombia. I would guess they think it’s at least as good as Portuguese wine, which is also in my bag every time I go back to my country.
As it couldn't be any other way, I finish this short story on the plane (which incidentally is not a low-cost flight this time) thinking... if the PhD does not go well, will there be a space in BIP for a photo travel journal? Since not everybody is fond of airports, I pick my camera to take a good shot through the window... oops! I am on a wing row... better focus on my PhD now.
*Collaborator at the Manufacturing Systems Engineering Unit (UESP)
